_______ A Beautiful Lie

old times

i was reminiscing when i was in da mrt just nw. on da way to hq. i was thinking of da old times. thinking of ppl who were once part of my life. n who are nw part of my life. thinking of wat happened before. n wats happening nw. thinking back of all those stupid n foolish n childish acts dat i've done. n of course. thinking of how my life wld turn out in da near future.

i miss some ppl who were once part of me. ppl like my uncle who passed away last year, ppl like danny woon, ppl like my conference gang, ppl like da liuetenant who haf ord-ed, ppl like mich and many more ppl. (i'm sori if i didnt mentioned any of u, but den if u WERE part of my life, u probably wont be reading since ur no more in my life rite? whatever.) but above all, i tink i miss danny da most. he's somewhat disappear but den he'll re-appear sooon. its just da gut feeling. i tink he's in da army nw since he refuse to retake his o levels last year. we met in OBS. when we were there, we always always fight. even after we came back. but one day, he told me he liked me. n yes. i liked him too. n den we were together. den we were not. cos our parents disapprove n circumstances don allow us to be together. we still keep in contact. till nw. but he's disappearing. n i wished dat he'll re-appear again.

somehow or rather, i regret dat i let my parents decision overcome my own. i thought abt all da stupid things i did. they were reali reali damn stupid. i wished i hadnt do them. but well. i cant turn back da time. i guess its just a learning experience. like, i've always wanted to join db when i was in year one. but my parents disapproved. n nw, i kinda regretting it again. (sounds like a deja vu?) i'm like having regrets cos my parents always disapprove. shdnt haf listened to them rite. but wth, parents ARE parents.

n den i was thinking abt my future. wat wld become of me? wld i be a failure? a slacker for lifE? den it struck me. i cant be tis way. i need to work hard to achieve good results to secure a good future. which reminds me of my common test marks. i did relatively ok for my papers. cos i didnt fail any. da worse i got was 27/50 for OM. 36.5/50 for HRM. 76/100 for IPT. 56.5 for CMA. i nt reali proud of my results.cos i noe i can do better if i studied harder. so dats y i must work harder. so i i'll achieve better results. n at least make my parents proud. i need to stop playing too much n NEED to start working harder.

ok. wth. i'm babbling. u don need to read tis entry if u tink its too long-winded/nonsensical/idiotic/unappropriate/whatever. i'm writing tis out for my own sake. so just get lost. to those who took da time to read, tanx for wasting ur time on me. for those real frens who reali stood by me, tanx alot.

lisaaaaa penned a beautiful lie
at 11:41 pm